Ugly Thoughts - There's No Such Thing As Bad Hair, Only Bad Thoughts
(N.B: The night before I wrote this I think must have prepped my hair in some any chunky plaits, which left me feeling particularly unattractive. I guess this thing really is a journey, as I feel like I've travelled past this point of frustated thinking now. But this is how I was feeling on that back then....)
I should’ve written this as I was thinking it cos now Im ashamed I even thought these things; but this morning I was having natural hair doubts.
- I was feeling ugly and alien-like, like this hair was making me abnormal.
- Why do I have to wrap my hair in a headscarf every night?
- Why does doing my hair have to mean I’m covered in grease?
- Am I fooling myself thinking this could work?
I was even asking why am I fooling myself, maybe some of us just have ugly hair.
I feel wrong even writing these thoughts now especially as we all know, these thoughts are WRONG!!
Sometimes it can be hard to see yourself as attractive when all day you have women represented as desirable and none of them have big chunky plaits sticking out of their head!
I have to say, when I had these thoughts this morning, my boyfriend was a big help to me! Regardless of whether my hair’s in a headscarf, fat plaits, messy twists, a big fro or a hot mess, he’s constantly telling me how beautiful I am with my natural hair. He accepts it as me and finds it so strange that Im having to learn to.
I think the main thing about any hair is that depending on how it is you can either feel good or sh*t; but I think that also largely depends on whether you see yourself as beautiful or not.For Eg: Despite my boyfriend telling me I look beautiful, I still had my doubts. I hope I feel more positive about my natural hair in the future.